Willow Hope – My Incredible Ivy

Grief.

Grief. It’s such a tricky thing. At first there’s so much and it’s so heavy it feels like you might drown. It fills you up completely until it feels like there is nothing to you but grief. Every breath you draw hurts. You feel like you float through each day, existing in your world but…

Holding her with open hands…

I remember when we brought Zoe home from the hospital at 3 days old. It didn’t seem like we should be allowed to just walk out with this tiny human, fully responsible for her life. I put her bassinet next to my bed and woke up several times each night, frantically feeling to make sure…

My Story

I am one of those people who had her life planned out at age ten. Become a teacher, get married, have kids. And life pretty much followed. I went to Hope College, became a teacher in Allendale, married Sam, and had two kids – Zoe and Eli. Last summer, Sam and I decided it was…

Letters

My sweet Willow Hope, It has been two months since I learned that you had gone to heaven and I would never get to hold you in my arms here on this earth. Your mommy’s heart has never been so shattered. For awhile, I was in denial. I kept thinking that there was still a…

Words of Truth

Can I be honest here? One of the hardest things about the journey I find myself on is trying to reconcile the immense grief I have over the loss of our precious baby, with the fact that I am still carrying a healthy little girl. My belly is expanding (perhaps a bit more rapidly than…

Learning the Ways of Grief

“Have mercy on me Lord, for I am in distress. Tears blur my eyes. My body and soul are withering away. I am dying from grief; my years are shortened by my sadness.” Psalm 31:9-10 Somehow until the past few months of my life, I was oblivious to this verse. In fact I feel like…